Originally Posted: November 3, 2011
Ok, folks... what's the deal? Every time I pronounce the word ‘router’ sounding like "rooter," people feel the need to loudly and adamantly cry out, "it's ROUTER!" (sounding like ‘rowter’) Feel free to go back and read that sentence again because, you won’t know how to read it until you’ve already read it and frankly, I’m pretty sure that some of you didn’t do it justice. So go ahead. Go back and read it and really shout “ROWTER” indignantly when you get to that part. Well, Were waiting…
Ok, so anyway, why do people get so indignant over the pronunciation of a word? I think it may be a bit of a knee-jerk defense of one's technological IQ. I mean, isn’t that what a big part of a person’s “value” is these days in the eyes of others? The more you know about technology, especially computer related, the more of a stud you are. Let’s face it, a pretty face, fabulous smile and meticulously manscaped body just isn’t enough anymore. You’ve got to be a computer whiz. You must not only have the know-how to download and burn your own movies, but also be able to link pretty much any electronic device that you currently possess. That's right, even the toaster and the nose hair trimmer because honestly, I don't want to even think about a world in which those two items are not connected in some fashion. You're getting the picture, right? Technological savvy is the current status indicator. Ok, maybe I've begun to swing the hammer at that nail a bit maniacally so I'll set it down gently and slowly back away. Just remember, I can still dive for it if needed.
Now just to be clear, I'm not arguing that "rooter" is the correct pronunciation of the word. In fact, when I discovered that most people were pronouncing it wrong…er… I mean, differently from me, I did a bit of internet research to try and discover the proper pronunciation and found many people on both sides of this phonetic argument. Still, information surrounding the original pronunciation of the word in an IT setting remains nebulous. One piece of information did become clear in my quick but thorough (enough) blog research: The word is pronounced as "rowter" most often in the US and as "rooter" most often in the UK. Still another piece of interesting information is that each side claims to pronounce the word correctly and views those who pronounce it differently as unenlightened imbeciles. Yes, it would be quite interesting to be a mouse on a desk at an American/British IT convention when talk of routers breaks out. And yea, there would be much pulling of hair and gouging of eyes among the Geeky ranks. Each camp would be chanting their own pronunciation louder and louder in an effort to drown out the foolish foes until finally a brave, if not scrawny, soul would run out in front of the rest twirling an Ethernet cord and shouting “ROUTER!” (go with your favored pronunciation here) ala William Wallace in Bravehart.
But, as usual, I digress. My point here is that it's just a word and knowing how word pronunciations change over time and locale, let's all try to let it slide. It’s just a word and guess what? Like it or not, it has more than one pronunciation. Rest assured, that a group of Tennessee Hillbillies would laugh just as loudly at you if they heard you pronounce the word, “creek” as you would when hearing them pronounce it. Ok, maybe the hill folk would cackle more than laugh, but you get my meaning.
Now, I know it’s hard for some of you, because everything needs to be black or white, dark or light, hot or cold, tech or non-tech, etc. Fortunately, because I know how hard it is, I’ve come up with a solution that I believe will help us all get along and keep our IT egos from becoming bruised. Let’s just change the name of those little magical boxes to a new word, one which flows off the tongue so effortlessly that there is no question how it ought to be pronounced. What greater way to bring about unity in this matter? Yes, let’s scrap “router” with its evil ying & yang pronunciations and usher in a new era. From here on out, I will be referring to those cute little boxes as "Guido," and I would appreciate it if you would all follow suit. Keep in mind, that the tech integrity of the entire world depends upon all of our cooperation on this matter. Oh, and no need to congratulate me on choosing such a magnificent name that just drips from the lips and couldn’t possibly be mispronounced. Just use it. Use it proudly. Scream it out from every PC, Wii, Xbox and Blue ray player! GUIDO! GUIDO! GUIDO!
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